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the doctor & river / clarity

tumblr : http://ican-always-seeyou.tumblr.com/... if you can't watch the video, there you go : https://vimeo.com/67075406 OK WHERE DO I BEGIN. HE KISSED HER. HE TOLD HER HE LOVED HER. (in his own way because he couldn't say it and she gave him a chance to say it differently...'if you ever loved me...' AND HE SAID IT. ugh i'm DYYYYIIIINNNNNG.) I'M PROBABLY GOING TO TYPE EVERYTHING IN CAPS I'M SORRY. no i need to be calm. LOLOLOL WHO AM I KIDDING I CAN'T BE CALM. i was SO scared by this finale. so so scared for my otp. i was imagining the worst, time rewritten, clara/eleven, ONLY BAD THINGS. AND WHAT DID WE HAVE. A FUCKING LOVE DECLARATION AND A KISS AND I BELIEVE RIVER WILL BE BACK, THERE ARE STILL MANY THINGS LEFT THAT WE DON'T KNOW AND AS LONG AS MOFFAT DOESN'T SAY THAT IT WAS RIVER'S END THEN IT'S NOT, OK? but if it is...i will be able to deal with it. because their scene was perfect. if the doctor was able to say goodbye, so will i. omg guys i'm so...so...I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHAT I FEEL I'M HAPPY AND SAD AND HURT AND IDK ANYMORE. let's speak about THE scene shall we. he hears her when she tells him to not...jump in his own timeline, weird stuff whatever. she says 'hear me' and he says 'no' BECAUSE IT HURTS HIM TOO MUCH. BECAUSE HE KNOWS THAT IF HE ADMITS HE SEES HER HE WILL HAVE TO LET HER GO AND HE DOESN'T HAVE THE STRENGHT TO DO IT. and then, AND THEN. HE FINDS THAT STRENGHT IN HIM. HE TAKES HER HAND AND HE SAYS THE MOST WONDERFUL THING TO HER. 'you're always here to me and i always listen. and i can always see you.' TELL ME HE DOESN'T LOVE HER. THE HATERS CAN GO CRYING BECAUSE HIS LOVE FOR HER COULDN'T BE MORE CANON THAN THAT. god i'm shaking writing all this. THE KISS. GUYS THE KISS. it has become my favorite kiss of them. HE INITIATED IT. BECAUSE HE WANTED TO, BECAUSE HE LOVES HER AQSJKGH. AND WHAT A KISS. SO MUCH TENDERNESS AND PASSION AND DESPAIR AND LOVE LOVE LOOOOOOVE. HE BREATHES HER. HE CAN'T HAVE ENOUGH. HE LETS HER LIPS GO AND THEN HE GOES FOR IT AGAIN BECAUSE HE NEEDS IT. and how they look at each other after... IT IS SO BEAUTIFUL. oh i forgot HIS HANDS ON HER FACE. WHEN HE KISSES HER HE TOUCHES HER HAIR AND WHEN HE TALKS TO HER HE STROKES HER CHEEKS JUST LET ME DIE HERE I CAN'T GO ON. then he says he's ready to let her go, that she MUST go, for her, for him, because they both deserve peace. BUT HE DOESN'T KNOW HOW TO SAY GOODBYE SO HE ASKS HER. 'HOW?' and she tells me how to say goodbye, and how to say i love you, and you see the struggle on his face, because he's so afraid of his own feelings and then he decides to do it. because that is what he wants to give to her. his love he never knew how to express, and peace. AND THE DOCTOR'S FACE WHEN SHE SAYS SPOILERS BECAUSE HE KNOWS IT'S THE LAST TIME SHE'LL SAY IT TO HIM. HE KNOWS THE END IS SO VERY NEAR, A FEW SECONDS AWAY. ugh. UGH UGH UGH. then she disappears and he looks so sad but he knows it was the right thing to do. he's accepted it. her death, what she's been through, he has come to terms with his guilt. EVERYTHING IN THIS SCENE WAS PERFECT I'M SO SORRY I EVER DOUBTED MOFFAT. BUT THIS IS MY OTP I'M ALWAYS FREAKING OUT FOR THEM. but moffat is their number one shipper, i should know that by now. this troll. ok, now that i vomited my feelings, about the video : it could have been way WAY better but that's something. i'll make others. BECAUSE I REALLY NEED TO. it is my song for the finale. well for my otp in the finale. i listenned to it in loop days before, just as i listenned to the end by...uh i lost his name, before the wedding. this song will forever be about them for me. i started the video friday because i had to do something to deal with my feels. i finished it quite quickly, that's a miracle. anyway, i hope you'll enjoy it and cry. :) JUST LIKE I DID. that's funny because i didn't cry when i saw the scene the first time, and sooner this evening i watched it again and i started sobbing like a infant. they are beautiful, they are epic, they are...my otp. forever. i'll never have another one like them. never. infos at the end of the video. sorry germany -_-